The jig is up. We all know that anthropogenic global warming is hysterical. I know it’s your job to hoodwink doctoral-level-educated men and women, but this whole “go green” thing is even more of an insult to our intelligence than even the product your are trying to sell us.

Feel free to go back to marketing the old way: showing us how your product is going to help us make money and improve quality of life for our patients.

Please watch this video by Roy W. Spencer, former NASA climatologist and climate expert, and produced by Declaration Entertainment:

Note to to people on the fence: No one is advocating dumping toxic sludge into the river or aquifers.

Note to anthropogenic global warming hysterics: Move to the Amazon, you hippie. Ipso facto, America and all its greatness is not for you.

optoblog comic #25 Scared of Events

Well, I know people have been secretly clamoring for more optoblog.com comics, so…you’re welcome!

Those of you who have been watching news only from the networks probably have no idea why current events are so scary. Those of us not simply listening to press releases straight from the White House and its Czars have learned scary things about hyperinflation, monetizing the debt, Cloward and Piven, communist infiltration in the government of a free republic, radical Muslim’s Caliphate, ATF’s Project Gunwalker, George Soros, the Nanny State, Cass Sunstein, back door gun control, Tax and Spend, the lie of Climate Change, Going Green = going broke, and ad infinitum stuff all designed to take away the God-given rights and liberties of Americans.

America, I am sure that the only way we are going to recover from this great big hole we’ve sleep-walked ourselves into is by returning to God. All of us need to repent and increase our Faith, Hope, and Charity. Only then will we be prepared to receive and accept his will regarding what our actions should be. Only then will He prosper our nation again.

Our government was founded upon faith-based principles. Invite everyone you know to increase their Faith in God, Hope, and Charity so that we can restore our government to the founder’s vision and so that God will bless the United States of America.

Well, I’ve done it yet again. There seems to be no end to all the inquiring minds out there. Just to review, I know what IP address you have and the URL that was in your address bar just before coming to my website. A search URL contains the search term that you used.

1. “is Crizal worth the extra expense” – That depends. The original Crizal, Crizal Alize, Crizal Alize’ with ClearGuard, Crizal Avance’ with Scotchgard, or the next one that they come out with 6 months after you buy the one available now.
2. “satan’s plan” – This search term was by someone from Lagos, Nigeria, Africa. (It directed them to this post.) Lemme splain. In pre-earth life, Jesus wanted us to have the freedom to choose to follow Heavenly Father and obtain Eternal life. Those who don’t obey God’s will and never repent would be lost. Those who disobey (all of us) would need a Savior in order to be worthy enough to enter into God’s presence again. Well, the Son of the Morning didn’t like that. Satan, wanted us all to be forced to choose God and obey His commands so that none of God’s children would be lost. It’s kind of like liberals vs. conservatives when you think about it.
3. “what scanner should you use with officemate” – If you are going to scan, go big. You will not regret buying a fast document scanner like the Fujitsu 6130. I used to have a slow HP ScanJet N6010. It lasted two years and died. I wasted so much time waiting for files to scan. With my Fujitsu, waiting is a thing of the past. Let’s say you get an EOB that you want to scan into OfficeMate. You pull up the patient’s file, select the eDocuments tab, and then press scan. It will scan duplex, then you hit complete, and you’re done. Fast, fast, fast. Plus mine came with Acrobat 9 Standard.
4. “nbeo optometry review notes” – I just wanted to bring this up because I’m so glad I’m done with school and boards.
5. “how to recharge pachmate dgh55″ – I’m thinking you should read the owners manual. If you don’t like keeping dead trees around, then scan it into a pdf with your Fujitsu scanner.
6. “stylish medicaid frames” – NO SUCH THING
7. “screening acute angle glaucoma with mydriasis with pen light in pcp office” – Yah, so what I think they want to know is before they dilate somebody, what’s the likelihood that they give them an angle closure pressure spike. I believe that should be in the manual for your nifty DigiScope. Someone in Maryland should just refer to their local optometrist.
8. “best way for optometrist to get FDA job” – I’m pretty sure you can get any government job you want by contributing enough money to the DNC. If you’re not a trust fund child, then I would spend loads of money to attend optometry school, study hard, work hard, graduate, and join the rest of America in the unemployment line.
9. “optometrists are stupid” – Someone in Alameda, CA was having a bad day.
10. “crack officemate” – Some web surfer in Indiana needs a crack for Officemate. Let’s see, I’m pretty sure stealing around $6000 for the initial year and ~$1400 per year after that could be considered enough to get you in trouble with the state optometry board. I don’t think it’s worth it. If you can’t afford it, do yourself a favor and try something else. Or, like I’ve said before, if you’re willing to crack expensive, niche software, then why stop there? Robbing banks and pimping can “earn” you boat loads of tax-free money.
11. “average christmas bonus for optometrist” – Let’s see. Um, try about $0.00
12. “pronounce similasan” – put the emphasis over the second “i” and then say the rest really fast. sim-IL-uhsahn. Or call their consumer information line, 1-800-240-9780, and they say it on the recorded message.
13. “Biofinity review” – This is by far the most searched term by people coming to my website from google and yahoo. Seriously, why don’t you just try it for a week or two? If you don’t like it, then try something else! These lenses could work great for you and terrible for someone else- or vice versa. It’s like asking other people if a certain brand or size of orthotic shoe insert works good.

I’m here to help.

Walmart practices grew 10% during 2008, on average, as Sam’s Club practices grew 6%.

Growth also varied depending on years at location.

I’ll be interested to see what 2009 stats will say. Anecdotally, my business was up 8% in 2008 while so far for 2009 I currently forecast it to be down over 8% (so back to 2007 levels). So when you think about it, 2009 could see me be down 16-18% from where I wanted to be.

Thanks Obama. That was such a great idea to spend our way out of a recession and have the government take over several private sector industries. Idiot.

Wow, I guess we Mormons should be thrilled that it took him three years to visit our leaders. And what’s laughable is that the only “solution” to “climate change” that The Left can come up with is increased taxes and higher energy costs. Nice.

Mormons as a whole consistently vote conservative. Personally, I can’t believe our leaders even granted him an audience, and further I can’t believe they turned off the lights at Temple Square for Earff Hour! We stand strong against gay marriage in Kalifornia, but then we appease with leaders of a cloaked fascist movement to take away our God-given rights? I think someone has some ‘splaning to do!!

You’ll notice that he met with our PR dept to give his schpeel. I’ll bet the PR department would meet with Lilburn Boggs if they thought it could remotely help with PR.

Algore, go home. We Mormons already know that we humans, made in God’s image, are the stewards over the Earff. No one is out there saying we should pollute rivers, lakes, and streams or cut down every tree in all the forests! God has provided this earth for our use and enjoyment to further His purposes. All this “green” stuff is a diversion to tax us into communism, and God does not approve of communism. The whole reason we are here on Earth is to exercise our free agency and have joy. The Global Warming-err,..Cooling…I-mean-Climate-Change folks seek to destroy both.